Kaleidoscope Read online

He was such a good guy.

  And he so totally loved me.

  “I’m okay,” I assured.

  “Brings up bad shit for you,” he reminded me, scanning my face, looking for indications I’d inadvertently taught him to search for when it came to me. Hiding fear. Burying things. Preparing to retreat.

  “I’m not happy someone got kidnapped,” I shared, and his arms around me got tight. “But I’m here, with you, Buford and Josephine. I’m full of good burritos. And I’m learning how to count my blessings instead of fear they’ll be swept away from me. So I’m good, outside of not being real happy you spent time today thinking I wouldn’t be.”

  I got another squeeze on his, “I’m fine, Emme.”

  It was my turn to search his features to make sure he was what he said.

  And he looked okay to me. Well, not okay. Handsome, intent and sweet, but that was his norm so that was okay.

  It was time to move us on.

  Not to bury it.

  Just to move past it.

  In order to do that, I asked, “You know what all this means?”

  “I know what all this means to me, that this guy was completely fucked in the head,” Jacob answered, and I grinned but shook my head.

  “What all this means is that it lays testimony to the blatant fact we need socialized medical care,” I announced.

  Jacob stared at me.

  Then he moved his eyes to the ceiling and stared at it.

  “Admit it, I’m not wrong,” I pushed.

  At that, Jacob angled up, taking me with him. The move was so sudden, I cried out and latched on. We were front to front with my hands clutching his shoulders and my legs wrapped around his hips when he started walking.

  Toward the French doors.

  “What are you doing?” I asked.

  Jacob didn’t answer. He kept walking then dipped down to open the door.

  Out we went with me crying, “Jacob! What are you—?”

  I didn’t get it all out. He made it to the edge of the pool, pulled me from his body even as I tried to keep hold and easily tossed me right into the water.

  Fully clothed.

  I came up spluttering, pulling my hair from my face and shouting, “Are you insane?”

  Standing at the side of the pool, hands on hips, smiling, Jacob declared, “Just sayin’, anytime you mention socializing medical care, you get tossed in the drink.”

  “You are insane!” I yelled, swiping an arm across the water in hopes of splashing him but I was too far away and thus failed.

  He kept smiling.

  Then he yanked his shirt over his head and I watched with some awe as he bent his knees and took off. His long straight body knifing through the air, it sliced into the water as he executed a perfect dive.

  God. He could even dive perfectly.

  In jeans.

  Or maybe it was perfect because it was hot he was doing it in jeans.

  Or maybe it was just hot because he was joining me.

  I treaded water as he swam under it and came up in front of me, wrapping an arm around my waist and pulling me to him as he did.

  I again grabbed his shoulders and wrapped my legs around his hips.

  “I’m glad we’re moving to my house,” I announced. “I don’t have a pool so when you don’t want to concede a valid, and I’ll just note, accurate point, you can’t toss me into it.”

  “Emme,” he said.

  “What?” I snapped.

  “Take off your sweater,” he ordered.

  I watched his face in the tranquil, revolving colors of the pool lights and noticed my man was not in the mood to discuss political ideology.

  Suddenly, I wasn’t either.

  So I pulled off my sweater.

  * * *

  An hour later…

  Jacob powering inside me, my back to the wall of the pool, my face in his neck, our soggy clothes strewn around the pool deck, my legs wrapped around his hips, he stated, “This summer, we’re puttin’ a pool in at your place, south side.”

  “Okay,” I breathed instantly.

  “And we’re not namin’ our puppy Josephine.”

  He kept powering up as I pulled my face out of his neck in order to look at him.

  “What?”

  He rammed in, I whimpered, he stopped so I whimpered again.

  “We’re namin’ her Daisy Mae.”

  I felt my eyes get wide as my legs quivered and I repeated my question from earlier, “Are you insane?”

  “Nope.”

  “A Rottie,” he stroked, I stopped talking, he did it again and stayed planted so I kept going, “is,” he pulled out then drove up again, I bit my lip then powered on, “a noble breed. We can’t name a noble dog Daisy Mae.”

  He ground up and that felt so good my hand slid into his wet hair and fisted.

  “Josephine doesn’t go with Buford,” he told me.

  “So?” I asked.

  Keeping one arm around me, his other hand slid over my belly, down and in.

  Then his thumb hit me.

  My head fell back and my entire body quivered.

  “She’s Daisy Mae,” Jacob declared.

  “Please move,” I whispered.

  “I will, you agree she’s Daisy Mae.”

  He was. He was totally insane.

  Or he was intent on driving me that way.

  I righted my head. “That’s not fair.”

  His thumb twitched and I moaned.

  “Daisy Mae,” he repeated.

  “Ja—”

  His thumb slid away and my eyes went wide as my arms and legs tensed around him.

  “Jacob!”

  “What’s our dog’s name?”

  “Please move,” I begged. “And I want your thumb back. We’ll talk about this later.”

  His lips came to mine, they were curved up and his eyes were dancing. There was something about having Jacob buried deep inside me, the warm waters of a pool lapping around our naked bodies, and his eyes dancing with humor that was completely and totally amazing. A moment to remember. Forever.

  Have mercy.

  “Say it. Daisy Mae,” he ordered.

  “Right. Okay. Whatever. We can insult her by calling her Daisy Mae.”

  His smiling mouth took mine, his tongue sliding inside, as his thumb honed in and he surged out then up, again planting himself deep but this time doing it without stopping.

  I forgot about Daisy Mae.

  I forgot about everything.

  And it would be fifteen glorious minutes before rational thought came back and it occurred to me I didn’t really care our puppy was called Daisy Mae. That was actually kind of cute.

  And more, I was super happy we were putting in a pool at my place.

  But I was never going to tell Jacob that I hoped it was heated.

  * * *

  Thirteen months later…

  The door opened and I saw my dad stick his head in.

  He jerked his chin up.

  I grinned at him then looked across the room to see Faye, as planned, had my mother’s undivided attention.

  Mom would freak if she knew what I was doing.

  When my sister got married, she’d done the same thing.

  Mom and Dad let their kids live their lives but when it came to their weddings, they stepped in, or I should say Mom stepped in, and demanded tradition. A church. A white or, if necessary (as I deemed it was), ivory gown. A reception line. Formal photographs. Proper speeches. And Jacob had been told in no uncertain terms that if he shoved his piece of wedding cake all over my mouth, Mom was confiscating his snowmobile.

  Last, and most important, the groom didn’t see the bride before the wedding.

  Therefore, I’d spent the night at Jacob and my house, Jacob spent his at Chace and Faye’s since he sold his place when he’d moved into mine six months ago.

  But I had something I needed to do.

  And I was going to do it.

  Lifting my skirt in my hand, I hustled
to the door.

  Dad and Krys were outside when I got through.

  Krystal was carrying a wooden box I’d dropped by Bubba’s a few days earlier. She was also smiling.

  Dad was deep breathing.

  “My baby girl,” he whispered.

  I looked up to him, saw the bright mixed with admiration in his eyes and grinned.

  “Do I look okay?” I asked, throwing out an arm.

  He nodded, his throat visibly convulsing.

  My grin became a smile. I wrapped my arms around him and got up on my toes to kiss his cheek.

  He gave me a hug and let me go, whereupon he gave me a shaky smile so I leaned in to give him another kiss on the cheek.

  After the kiss, I whispered, “Love you, Daddy.”

  “Love you too, my precious baby,” he whispered back. “Also love that today I’m givin’ you to a good man who’ll see to you.”

  I drew in breath.

  “Or maybe I don’t love it,” Dad went on. “But at least I can live with it.”

  At his words, I gave him a squeeze and another smile.

  Then I turned to Krys.

  She handed me the box.

  I wasted no more time since I didn’t have any and ducked out the side door. Carefully, on my fabulous and fabulously expensive ivory heels, I dashed around the back of the church and went in the door on the other side.

  Chace and Rich were waiting for me.

  “Is he alone?” I asked Chace.

  “Yeah, Emme,” he answered, looking me up and down then his gaze came to mine. Without further ado and absolutely no warning (except the intense look in his eyes), he proceeded to blow me away. He did this by whispering, “Love this, honey. I couldn’t build a better you for my boy.”

  At his words, my heart skipped a beat and I had to let go of my skirt and put a hand to the wall to stay standing.

  “That means a lot,” I whispered, and it did. From Chace, it definitely did.

  “I know,” he replied.

  I pulled in breath, and if I kept doing that, I was likely to pass out.

  “Darlin’, you gotta hurry,” Rich said, and I looked to him. “You’re both at the church on time but it’s also kinda important for you to be in the sanctuary on time.”

  “Right,” I mumbled, and he smiled at me.

  Then he bent in to give me a peck on the cheek.

  When he was done, I looked between the men, giving them a grin.

  Then I went to the door they were guarding to keep visitors at bay. I lifted a hand and knocked.

  “Yo!” I heard Jacob call, and that set my lips to again curving.

  I turned the knob, put my hands behind my back to hide the box, and walked in. Closing the door with my foot, I saw Jacob standing in front of a mirror tying a dove gray tie.

  Dark suit that fit perfectly. Dove gray tie. Charcoal gray vest. Ivory rose in his lapel.

  God, he was beautiful.

  Suddenly, I understood why a bride didn’t see her groom before the wedding. Because if she saw him in all his splendor, she might not be able to fight back the urge to jump him and consummate the marriage precipitously, forcing everyone to wait to get to the buffet.

  Luckily, Jacob and I had done that, repeatedly, and we didn’t have time to do it again, so I was able to fight that urge.

  Barely.

  His eyes in the mirror came to me and his hands stopped moving.

  “Hey,” I greeted.

  Slowly, he turned. As he did, his gaze was moving all over me but he said nothing.

  Then he said something.

  “Didn’t know you could get more beautiful.”

  Tears hit my throat and so I wouldn’t dissolve in a puddle of goo, or alternately messy sobs that would destroy my makeup, I quipped, “I aim to please.”

  “You excel at that, baby.”

  God, he wasn’t making this easy.

  He was making it beautiful, but he wasn’t making it easy.

  To get past that, I had to suck in a breath through my nose.

  “You wanna make out before we get hitched, kinda hard to do with you across the room,” Jacob remarked, and finally I grinned.

  “You can’t tell Mom I’m here,” I told him as I started his way.

  “I’m more likely to share government secrets with terrorists than tell your mother that,” he told me, and I giggled as I stopped two feet in front of him.

  Suffice it to say, Jacob wasn’t a big fan of tradition when it came with being forced to sleep in a whole different town than me, pre-wedding or not. But Mom put her foot down in a way neither Jacob nor I could deny.

  That still didn’t mean he was happy about it.

  “Hopefully, it won’t come to that,” I replied, and Jacob’s focus intensified on me.

  Or, more accurately, the fact that I stopped two feet away.

  “Emme, baby, I’m supposed to step in a church in five minutes and I don’t think you’re supposed to be on my arm when I do that. You wanna clue me in why you’re here?”

  I pulled the box from around my back and lifted it up between us.

  His eyes dropped to it and his body went completely still.

  He’d told me about what Dane had done with his kaleidoscope.

  It creeped me way the hell out that Dane was following me, so I decided to discuss that with my therapist and find a way to let it go. And I did that.

  It hurt way too much to think of Jacob’s kaleidoscope dumped out with the trash.

  I didn’t discuss that with my therapist, though.

  I did something about it.

  “I went back to the store where I bought it, but it’s now a dry cleaners,” I shared. Jacob’s eyes didn’t leave the box but I kept going. “So I asked Chace if he could help. Chace knows some woman in Denver who’s good at finding stuff out and she got the number of the old owners of the shop. She called them and found out who made the kaleidoscopes.”

  Slowly, Jacob’s eyes came to me and what I saw in them made my throat close and my nose sting with tears.

  I swallowed and my voice was husky when I went on.

  “She called that guy and he agreed to meet me. He’s eighty-three and quit making them a few years ago. But when I told him our story,” I moved the box toward him and finished, “he made this for you and me.”

  Jacob didn’t move. Not for a long time.

  I knew why and it was sweet. Very sweet.

  But we were imminently getting married. I needed to move this along.

  So I called, “Honey?”

  He finally moved. His eyes and hands going to the box, he took it, flipped it open, and I heard his indrawn breath when he saw what was inside.

  The old guy outdid himself. The last kaleidoscope was a thing of beauty.

  This one could easily be declared a miracle.

  I watched, deep breathing, as Jacob pulled it out, set the box aside and turned it around in his hands like it was the world’s most precious entity.

  And this time, unlike the last, I knew.

  I’d had glorious months and months of knowing that those hands moving on me made me feel l just as precious.

  “Do you like it?” I whispered, and his eyes shot to mine.

  He said nothing.

  He didn’t have to.

  Staring into his eyes, they said it all.

  My breath hitched.

  “You best go back to your mother, honey,” he murmured.

  “Yeah,” I agreed softly.

  Neither of us moved.

  “Go, Emme, or the wedding’s gonna be delayed an indefinite amount of time and your hair is not gonna look like that when you stand up in the sanctuary,” he stated.

  My hair was in an elegant updo à la Dominic (another Mom decree). It took two hours to achieve.

  Mom’s head would likely split down the middle if I had sex hair for my wedding.

  In other words, that got me moving.

  I nodded but I couldn’t help it. Not in that moment. Not because
, in five minutes, we were about to begin building our lives legally, spiritually, emotionally and indelibly connected.

  Not after the way Jacob had just looked at me.

  So I took my chances, leaned into him, put a hand on his chest, got up on my toes and tipped back my head.

  Jacob didn’t touch me but he did bend his neck and give me his mouth.

  I pressed my lips to his.

  His tongue slid out, my mouth opened, and he gave me a light stroke that felt amazing and tasted unbelievably sweet.

  When he was done, against my lips, he whispered, “Go, baby.”

  I nodded, my nose sliding against his as I did, and pulled back. I gave him a trembling smile and headed to the door.

  “Emmanuelle?” he called when I had my hand on the knob.

  I turned to him.

  “When we get to the Brown Palace tonight and you see the box the staff are putting on your nightstand for me, I’ll tell you the story about how I tracked down an old guy and told him what I wanted. I’ll also tell you how, until about two minutes ago, I thought he was a total whackjob when he laughed for five minutes before agreeing to make you a kaleidoscope and insisting on doing it for free.”

  My hand went from the knob to lay flat on the door as my knees went weak, my heart slid into my throat and the vision of Jacob started swimming.

  “Go, baby,” Jacob urged gently.

  Hearing his gentle words, seeing his tall frame, it would only be Jacob who could look beautiful even through tears.

  “I really, really, really like you, Jacob Decker,” I whispered.

  “I know,” he whispered back.

  The smile I sent him was seriously trembling before I dashed out the door.

  * * *

  Deck

  Putting the kaleidoscope to his eye, pointing it at the window, Deck turned the dials and his vision was accosted with nothing but beauty.

  It was extraordinary to witness.

  But by then he was used to it as he had it every day.

  As the lights and colors danced, he heard a sharp knock on the door before he heard Chace calling, “Deck. It’s time.”

  Deck watched the miraculous dance Emme gave him another long moment before he took the kaleidoscope from his eye, carefully laid it in its box and closed the lid.

  He moved to the door and he did this ignoring Chace grinning huge at the box.

  He didn’t have time for that shit.

  It was time to marry his Emme.