Fantastical f-3 Read online

  Uh-oh!

  “Noctorno –”

  He leaned forward slightly but ominously. “I’m certain you can be creative, can’t you, Cora?”

  “I’ve decided I like eating bunny and my nightgown is perfectly fine, thank you,” I snapped, wrapping my arms around my belly protectively.

  “You’ll need a bath. You like to bathe, I reckon.”

  Oh shit.

  I did, indeed, like to bathe. Actually, I was hoping I wasn’t already ripe.

  “Noc –”

  “You’ve earned breakfast with what you gave me on the hides. It was so good, love, you earned a trip to the river too. Anything else you want, you work for.”

  I unwrapped my arms from my belly and planted my hands on my hips, leaning forward slightly myself.

  “How much more of a jerk can you be?” I asked.

  “Why don’t you see?” he returned.

  “Ugh!” I grunted, my arms shooting straight down, my hands in fists, my head going back so I could stare in disgust at the ceiling. Then my chin tipped down sharply and I glared at him. “I hate you!” I yelled.

  “You already told me that.”

  “Well, I hate you more than I hated you before.”

  “I don’t really care.”

  “And I hated you a lot before,” I informed him.

  “I repeat, I don’t really care.”

  “Well, you’ve made that clear,” I snapped.

  His head tilted to the side and he grinned.

  “Is there something you need to do?” he asked.

  “Plot your murder?” I replied.

  His grin turned to a smile and it sucked that it was hot.

  “Other than that.”

  Yes, there was something I needed to do and that something was go to the bathroom. Then bathe (in the river, for God’s sake, yikes!). Then eat.

  And I needed him for all those things, I was guessing. I mean, I could do the first and second myself but he had to protect me from vickrants or whatever else was out there while I did it.

  I glared at him. He held my glare calmly.

  Then I tore my eyes from his and asked myself out loud, “Why did I kiss this jerk? Why? Damn my pride! Damn it to hell!”

  “I take it that means you agree to the terms of our continuing relationship,” he remarked and my gaze cut back to him.

  “Jerk!”

  His eyebrows went up. “Are you saying you don’t?”

  “Go to hell!”

  He shrugged and then moved to his shirt. “You could, of course, go forth on your own. The vickrants will be hunting you or The Shrew may send toilroys.” He shook his head and I didn’t like the idea of toilroys. Vickrants were bad enough. Furthermore, I didn’t know who The Shrew was but any shrew, I knew, was bad news.

  Damn.

  He pulled his shirt on as I clipped out, “Fine.”

  He turned only his head to me.

  “Fine?”

  “Fine!” I snapped.

  He grinned.

  I glared.

  He grabbed his boots and tugged them on.

  When he straightened, he extended his arm to the hide-covered opening.

  “Fancy a bath?”

  I growled under my breath and stomped to the hides.

  From behind me I heard a manly chuckle.

  Seriously, I freaking hated this world!

  Chapter Six

  Written in the Sky

  I had a plan.

  It probably wasn’t going to work but at least I had a plan.

  See, Noctorno took me outside into the overcast day. He also took me somewhere secluded and gave me privacy while I attended to nature’s call while I was in nature – not my favorite thing in this world or my own, in fact, I never did it in my own but once and that was bad enough so I never did it again. But it was the call of nature and nature was my only choice so I answered the call.

  Then he took me back to the cave, lifted me onto his horse, Salem (who seemed to snort his greeting at me though I couldn’t sense this like I could sense what Aggie meant when he chirped, it was only the impression I got), he got on Salem behind me and we took what seemed to be a long ride to the river.

  My bath wasn’t all I’d hoped it would be seeing as he took off his boots and waded in with me, we both got in fully-clothed, we had no soap and although the river was gorgeous (regardless of the gray day) and crystal clear, it was danged cold.

  Sopping wet, we rode back, he stoked the fire while I sat by it, hugging my knees shivering then he informed me he’d be back and he took off.

  That was when I decided on my plan. I sat there pulling my stiff fingers through my hair, detangling it and hopefully drying it as I alternately got up and fed fuel to the fire and decided what to do to get out of my latest dire predicament.

  I was going to tell the truth.

  He’d likely think I was mad but I didn’t care.

  I had to do something.

  I heard hooves on stone and knew he was back.

  I bit my lip and felt a thrill race up my spine. I didn’t know if this thrill was fear or something else and I didn’t think about it.

  I had to concentrate on what I would say to get him to believe me.

  The hides were swept back and he walked in looking great even though his shirt was wrinkled and his hair was mussed. Or, maybe it was because of the latter. He was also carrying two jugs hooked to just one finger with the rest of his fingers wrapped around a rough sack and another rough sack in his other hand. He dropped the sacks and put the jugs on the table.

  Then he turned to me.

  “I’ve returned,” he announced the obvious, a smile playing at his gorgeous lips.

  “Goodie,” I muttered churlishly.

  The smile grew full-fledged.

  Ugh.

  “Fresh milk,” he said, tipping his head to the jugs. “And ale,” he went on.

  Yuck. I hated milk and beer. Still, it was something. Though, I wished I knew how to use that kettle contraption. I’d checked it out and it was beyond me. There was no filter. And even if I figured it out, there was no water. And I needed caffeine, stat.

  “Right,” I mumbled.

  He lightly kicked one of the sacks with the toe of his boot. “Porridge oats, bread, butter, sugar and salt beef,” he went on.

  Now we were talking.

  “Fabulous,” I murmured.

  He lightly toed the other sack. “Clothes for you. And shoes.”

  Oh dear.

  I bit my lip.

  He smiled again.

  Oh shit.

  “Now, love,” he started walking toward me, “I hope you spent my time away thinking about how creative you can be.”

  Oh shit!

  I started backing up.

  “We need to talk,” I informed him.

  His head tipped to the side but he didn’t stop moving. “Well, that’s creative but not what I was thinking.”

  Oh shit!

  My back hit stone so I lifted a hand, palm out.

  “Noctorno,” I whispered.

  His chest came up against my hand and kept coming, pushing it back so it was caught between our bodies.

  Yes, that was how close he was.

  Yikes!

  “Uh –”

  “I warn you not to delay, Cora, I’m hungry and it’d be a shame, me eating in front of you,” he advised.

  I stared up at him and all I could see were his light blue eyes. They were very blue and very clear. Like the sky on a sunny, cloudless day.

  “Your eyes are like the sky on a sunny day,” I blurted and his mouth twitched.

  Oh God. Why did I say that?

  But I knew I said it because he was that close and he was that hot. A hot guy that close would make you blurt anything, even if he was a jerk.

  He pushed closer and I felt his heat hit more than my hand and let me tell you, his heat was hot.

  Wow.

  His head dipped so his face was close to mine. “Sweet,
” he whispered in his deep voice.

  Wow… and… nice.

  “You’re very hot,” I told him.

  “I can get hotter,” he told me.

  Yikes!

  “Noctorno –”

  “Whatever you do, I want you to do it with your mouth.”

  Oh dear.

  “And tongue,” he went on.

  Oh man.

  My fingers fisted in his shirt and I said quickly, “I’m not of this world.”

  He blinked and he did it slow.

  Then he growled, “Pardon?”

  “That’s what we need to talk about.”

  He straightened to his full height, his head turned to the side, his jaw got hard then he muttered, “Gods.”

  “No, seriously,” I said.

  His head turned back to me. “Yes, I see. You’ve used your time thinking how creative you could be.”

  This wasn’t starting great.

  I persevered mostly because I had no other choice.

  “Okay,” I began, moving up to my toes which did take me higher but even though I was relatively tall, he was far taller and I didn’t even get close, “listen to me, all right?”

  “I told you, I’m hungry,” he reminded me.

  “I’ll hurry but promise to listen, okay?”

  He stared at me but said not a word. I took this as a yes.

  “Right, okay. I’m not from here. I’m from somewhere else.”

  “And where are you from, Cora?” he asked with ill-concealed impatience.

  “Uh… earth?” I ventured.

  His lips thinned before he told me, “I’m from earth too.”

  Well, at least we resided on the same planet…ish. Good to know (kind of) I wasn’t beamed to a different galaxy, just catapulted to an parallel world.

  “Okay, that answers that but I’m from an alternate universe earth where we have computers and smart phones and, uh… cable TV.”

  He scowled at me.

  I kept at it. “I’m an administrative assistant. I work at an ad agency. I live in an apartment. I’m single, as in, not married. I had a boyfriend, his name was Brian, but he wouldn’t marry me so I had to cut my losses and break up with him before, you know, life passed me by.”

  He continued to scowl at me but at the mention of Brian I felt his body go still and I watched his face go hard.

  These were ominous signs but I kept going. “See, I went to sleep and then I woke up and I was here. I mean, I went to sleep at home, my home, where, you know, beds aren’t made of feathers but of…” I didn’t know what mattresses were made of but I was sensing his patience waning so I sallied forth, “Other stuff. And you don’t understand birds and there are no curses. That was why I didn’t know about the Rosa and Dash thing. See, we don’t have curses but even if we did, I wouldn’t know about that curse because I’m not the Cora you know. I’m a different Cora, one who’s fat but polite and doesn’t snore and…”

  He cut in with, “You aren’t fat.”

  “You said I’d gained weight.”

  “You have. You’ve also grown your hair.”

  Now we were getting somewhere.

  “See!” I exclaimed. “That right there proves I’m not the Cora you know.”

  “No, it proves that in the six months since I last saw you, you stopped watching every bloody morsel you put into your mouth and let your hair grow.”

  He hadn’t seen me in six months?

  “You haven’t seen me in six months?” I asked.

  “For the gods’ sakes,” he clipped.

  “We’re married!” I cried. “Why haven’t you seen me in six months?”

  “Because you hate me, Cora, and I’m not overly fond of you.”

  I latched onto that. “There you go. See, the Cora I am knows how to baste meat and isn’t lazy. I’ll admit, I’ll drag my feet on stuff I don’t want to do but eventually I’ll do it. I’m polite and my parents and friends think I’m funny. I don’t want to brag or anything, but I’m pretty cool to be around. If you give me a chance, I can show you I’m not the Cora you know.”

  “I’ll wager you can. And I’ll wager you’ll stick with it every second of the day and live it with every breath you take. But all of it will be an act of pure deception.”

  Jeez, if he believed that then the Cora of this world must be a serious bitch.

  “No one can do that,” I said softly.

  “You could,” he returned. “You see, my love, a year and a half ago I bedded a woman so cold, it was a wonder my cock didn’t splinter to shards when I drove it inside you.” I gasped at his words but he kept talking. “And but hours ago, just your mouth was so warm it lit a fire inside me. If you could turn that around, you could do anything.”

  I flattened my hand on his chest, got higher up on my toes and said quietly, “But, don’t you get it? That also proves I’m not the Cora you know.”

  “It, and this nonsense you’re spouting, only proves how desperate you are to keep me on your good side so I’ll keep you safe from Minerva and do it in the style which you undoubtedly require.”

  Minerva?

  I didn’t get the chance to ask, he kept talking. “But Dash believes your performance, Rosa adores you and therefore, out of respect for them, I’ll keep you safe and fed but I’ll damned well get what I can out of you in the process.”

  I fell back to the soles of my feet but kept my eyes to his, asking, “Why do you hate me so much?”

  This was the wrong question. I knew it when the light of rage hit his eyes at the same time his face went stone cold.

  “Why?” he whispered.

  I knew he thought I shouldn’t have to ask but I felt I should know what I was dealing with.

  “Yes, why?”

  “You dare ask?”

  “Yes, Noctorno, seeing as I don’t know you, I met you just yesterday, I dare ask,” I stated cautiously.

  “So this is your game now?”

  “No, this is honesty,” I told him honestly.

  His hold on his temper slipped and his face got in mine where he clipped, “Sly cow.”

  Um… ouch.

  “That’s mean and it isn’t true,” I returned quietly.

  He kept at me. “Black with trickery to your bloody soul.”

  “That isn’t true either,” I whispered.

  He glowered at me and I did my best to brave it out. When I was about to give up, he gave in.

  “This is the game you wish to play?”

  “It isn’t a game,” I reminded him of something he refused to believe.

  “This is the game you wish to play,” he decided and I sighed.

  I was right. He refused to believe or, likely, Cora of this world was just that much of a bitch.

  “Right,” he went on, “then you play your game, I play mine.” That didn’t sound too good, I braced and he kept talking which luckily meant he explained. “You’re the other half to my soul.”

  I blinked.

  Then I whispered, “What?”

  “You heard me.”

  “I’m the other half to your soul?”

  “In all the kingdom, in our generation, there are only two men whose souls were split at birth, the other half put in their lifemates. Dash to Rosa and you to me. The she-god saw fit to award Dash all the sweetness of Rosa and for some bloody hideous reason she saw fit to saddle me with all the foulness of you.”

  I didn’t know what to say to that, it wasn’t nice but it also sounded like something the Cora of this world deserved so I didn’t speak.

  Noctorno did. “For any other man but Dash or me, they could take anyone as bride. For him, it was only Rosa, the reason why you couldn’t have him, not that he wanted you. To hold back the curse you started to unleash yesterday, and because we agreed to do it in order to give the others the happiness they deserve, you had to leave him to her and wed me. And for me, it was only you. I had no other choice.”

  Oh my God.

  That was crazy.

&n
bsp; “That’s crazy!” I cried, pressing back into the wall.

  “Bloody right it is,” he agreed firmly.

  I stared at him.

  As crazy as this was, it was worse. Because he struck me as a man who liked choice, a man who would value, beyond anything, his free will, a man who’d fight and die for it and yet it had been taken away.

  “Couldn’t you, um… protest this decision?”

  His brows shot up. “To the she-god?”

  “Uh… yes?” I tried.

  His brows descended and his eyes narrowed. “You are mad.”

  “I take it you don’t question the gods,” I muttered.

  “No, Cora, even you wouldn’t question the gods. Our fates were written in the sky the moment we were born.”

  Oh. Wow.

  “Written in the sky?” I breathed.

  “Me to you, you to me for all the kingdom to see.”

  Holy crap.

  Then something else occurred to me.

  “Uh-oh,” I whispered.

  “Pardon?”

  “Uh-oh,” I repeated.

  “Uh what?”

  I guess they didn’t have uh-oh here either.

  I moved around that. “Noctorno, I am not the other half to your soul. The other Cora is.”

  “Gods,” he hissed, losing patience.

  “No!” I cried. “It’s true. If you could get in trouble being with –”

  I stopped speaking when he pressed closer.

  “Excellent try, love, but it’s not going to work.”

  “No, seriously –”

  His hands spanned my hips and I quit talking.

  “The she-god wrote that you’re the other half to my soul which meant I had to bind myself to you but it didn’t mean I couldn’t bed whoever I wanted and I do. So even if you aren’t the Cora of my world, as you lie that you aren’t, none of the gods would give a toss if I kiss you, touch you, taste you and drive into you and they also wouldn’t give a toss that I let you do the same to me, except, obviously, the last so let’s just say they won’t mind if you ride me.” His face dipped closer and he finished with, “Hard.”

  His words were coarse but even so I was stuck on something he said earlier and therefore asked with disbelief, “You’ve cheated on me?”

  He grinned and his grin was wicked. “If you’re not my wife, then no.”

  “You’ve cheated on me!” I cried.

  “So you’re my wife?”